I'm a rapper from way back, so it was no surprise to me when I was arrested yesterday solely on the fact that I was wearing a large toilet seat on a chain around my neck. Bling is in. That was until the police took me back to the barracks where the local "class" clown put the seat on my head then took a dump. Have you ever gone home only to realize that you have to explain to your significant other why you have human poo in your hair. Then wondered why they wouldn't put out? I have, which is why I am forming a protest against all women who confuse me with lines like "hey stop that?" and "dammit don't touch me there I'm your sister"

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