I try to better myself everyday. Some days are better than others. I can sit here with a million things to say and can't find the words.

I try to keep my life simple. All I want is to have a loving, loyal relationship. And just like everything else, I try to do my best but sometimes I mess up or I am misunderstood. And then comes is the pain that follows as the love walks away.

Perhaps I became a romantic somewhere along the way.

How this happened? I think it has to do with most of my past relationships all ended with the other cheating on me.

This also made me a bit paranoid and jealous and I know that it can hurt the one I am with.

So what does a romantic do when he pushes the one he loves away??

Right now he cries on a blog and all those stopping in can see his heart bleeding on the ground as his soul is torn apart. Wishing that there was a way he could fix the problems, some of the problems that are out of his control. I can not control her having the need to seek out other men. I don't understand why she needs these men.